(I fucking hate it when
(I fucking hate it when something crashes as I’m in full literary flow. Start again… less eloquently).
Been doing some surfing, skipping around far too many sites which I really ought to name-check here. Read through my backlog of NTKs this weekend - favourite link was Lost in Translation. Had so much fun with this one translating things from English to “English?” - favourite so far is “The Visor Edge™ is available now at £329 (EUR 440) including VAT”, which becomes “The edge of the mold of the hour of the sun _ is _ available for the bathtub (329 EUR the 440) of including/understanding”.
Got enticed in by the bus ads for seriously.com ("seriously, I tried it once but I think I got away with it"). Some nice soundbites on there but as ever, reading long text on the web is a wee bit tedious, especially when it’s in a crunchy little Flash windows with naff scrolling and lots of greys on white which look like white on white on my laptop screen. I did particularly like the bit about "a picture’s worth a thousand words" being disproved by the three words "I love you".
Speaking of words, we’re doing some kind of chat up lines for Disney, and remembering the fun lines that used to be on the Durex website I thought I’d have a quick troll for interesting ones. Discovered this site which has a suitably large selection of crap and one or two amusing ones, including what must be the longest chat-up “line” ever:
Okay, so I came over here to ask you to dance, but I’m kind of concerned. I mean, we could hit it off really well, end up having a few drinks, next thing you know you’re giving me your number because I’m too shy to ask for it, I finally get up the nerve to call and we take in a movie, have some dinner, I relax, you relax, we go out a few more times, get to know each other’s friends, spend a lot of time together, then finally have get past this sexual tension and really develop this intense sex life that is truly incredible, decide our relationship is solid and stable, so we move in together for a while, then a few months later get married, I get a promotion, you get a promotion, we buy a bigger house. You really want kids, but I really want freedom, but we have a kid anyway, only to find that I am resentful, the sparks start to fade and to rekindle them we have two more lovely kids, but now I work too much to keep up with the bills, have no time for you, you’re stressed and stop taking really good care of yourself, so to get past our slow sex life and my declining self-confidence I turn to an outside affair for sexual gratification. You find out because I’m careless and a lousy liar, you throw me out (justifiably so) and we have to explain to the kids why mommy and daddy are splitting up. That’s just too sad. Think about the children. For God’s sake, if you dance with me and we hit it off, let’s just keep it sexual, because we both know where it’s going.
What else? Oh yeah, I always love a good blog site. Well, I was playing web-trumps the other day and I clicked off one of the cards onto Zannah’s site. Fun. I oughta try all those pointless tests myself (had a go at the sanity test and found myself a little more insane than Zannah, at around 69%).