This isn’t going to work. I can’t stand meat.
OK, let me clarify. I quite like thin pig-like meat – I’ve had bacon, prosciuttio-like wild boar, and salami, and I find all of those quite palatable. Pork chops, on the other hand, just make me think of pig fat. Anything made of cow tastes absolutely disgusting. The Venison I had at Juniper was good, but those sausages left my mouth cloyed with grease all night and I couldn’t contemplate anything similar again. The thought of chicken makes me retch, partly because of the tray-load of chickens that Greta burnt in our house earlier this year, the smell of burnt chicken fat is almost as strong in my mind as the piggy version, partly because chicken seems less meat and more mass-produced factory product. Other poultry I could probably handle quite well – the pheasants we had last Christmas weren’t bad, and I’m quite tempted to try goose and quail. Lamb I imagine is quite nice, but again a bit too meaty (=brown) for me and reminds me of picking strands of mutton from between my teeth when I was about three years old.
I think I’m gonna have tofu stir-fry for dinner. Breakfast was a big salad with feta cheese and soft-boiled egg. Think I need to get some salami and some nice ham.