Tom
As I was boarding the train from London back to Sheffield today, I thought I spotted Tom sitting in one of the carriages. I looked again and it quite plainly wasn’t him, but it set my mind wondering: when did I last see him? I had a feeling we’d met sometime in the last couple of years, but I had no idea when that could possibly have been, the last time I can think of when I might have seen him was Rob’s wedding, about ten years ago. I got to wondering what he was doing now, whether he had a new band, whether he was any nearer to making it in the music industry, whether he currently had an outlet for his incredible bass chops and OTT heavy metal personality.
So I was gobsmacked when, just a couple of minues ago, Simon phoned me to say that Tom has killed himself. Spooked too: I’ve heard of many freaky experiences happening around the time of peoples’ deaths, but I’ve never experienced it myself.
I was never really very close to Tom, he was never a friend, always a friend’s older brother, but when we were growing up (and indeed for long after), he was the epitome of coolness and the best bass player I’m ever likely to meet. As I got older I remember feeling a kind of pride,
almost a “we are not worthy”, when he started talking to me as an equal and a fellow bass player. Later I realised all was not well with him; I think the fact that music was so central to his life and yet he never managed to get the break he longed for and deserved must have been a big disappointment to him.
So, despite only having been tangentially aware of his existence for many years, and despite today being the first day I’d even thought of him in probably two years, I feel a big loss and a huge sadness that I’ll never see him again. My heart goes out to his family.